The 33D Invader (2011)

One from the rewatch pile…

The 33D Invader (2011)

Film:

I just love watching international films. Sure the whole ‘subtitles’ thing may turn many people off, but the fact that we are able to watch films that aren’t restricted by Hollywood, and therefore, English cinematic conventions, is a great thing for film fans. To me, the greatest continent for a variety of genre films is Asia, with the highlights probably being Bollywood, Hong Kong action and J-horror.

This film, Mi Tao Cheng Shu Shi 33D aka The 33D Invader isn’t typical of the output we’ve previously seen from the above countries. Believe it or not, it is a mix of 80s teen sex comedy, Weird Science, The Terminator and Species (and maybe a bit of a My Stepmother is an Alien). Figure that out! The film was directed by Cash Chin, who also gave us bawdy romps like Sex and Zen II, and was written by Sean Chan, who thankfully, seems to have had nothing else he has written produced.

This totally bizarre film goes like this: in 2046, an alien race known as Xucker, through their attacks on Earth and the resulting radiation, have reduced male fertility by 99%, and so the human race is dying out. A girl named Future (Macy Wu) has been sent back in time to 2011 in order to collect ‘good’ sperm to repopulate the human race, but somehow the Xucker learn of this plan, and have also sent their best operatives, known cleverly as Xucker Number 1 (Kato Takako) and Xucker Number 2 (Hsueh Ya-Wen) to stop her.

Unfortunately, Future’s trip back through time lands her in an apartment complex populated by a bunch of bumbling and horny university students and their female, mostly promiscuous, neighbors, who whilst apparently on a study vacation, are doing anything but study. Will Future collect some decent sperm to re-populate the Earth, and will we bear witness to many scenes of naked Asian hotties while she attempts to succeed in her mission?

Let’s hope so!!

This was one of the most schizophrenic films I have ever seen. The soft-core sex scenes are filmed like they are aimed at aficionados of high-class VHS erotica with delicate lighting and soft sexy music, but the low-brow comedy is abrasive and attempts a Farelly Brothers styled grossness, highlights (or lowlights) being penis-eating, and ejaculating on a teacher in class.

This scatter-shot approach is unfortunately The 33D Invader’s biggest undoing, as it’s too explicit for a younger audience who might appreciate the sophomoric and lowbrow (and mostly inappropriate) humour, but adults won’t. If the sex had been played for laughs, which admittedly it attempts occasionally and unsuccessfully or if the entire thing had been played as a straight sci-fi flick with occasional gag as and nudity, it might have felt more complete, but the extremes, in particular the casual attitude towards rape,( which felt completely out of place amongst the infantile humour) are too far apart for it to be truly successful.

Score: **

Format: Madman’s 2.35:1 anamorphic transfer is sharp enough and serves the films vivid colour scheme well. Audio is available either in the original Cantonese in Dolby Digital 5.1 or a ‘andarin dub in DTs 5.1. Considering this IS little more than a soft-core, 80s styled sex comedy, the sound is as active as you would expect. English titles are also also provided and they are a source of accidental humour as they are occasionally nonsensical.

Score: **1/2

Extras: Not much in the extras department, I am afraid. Just trailers for this film. the Raid, Sex and Zen: Extreme Ecstacy, The Forbidden Legend: Sex and Chopsticks and Big Tits Zombie 3D.

Score: **

WISIA: I’ve watched it twice, that’s once too much.

Hentai Kamen (2013)

One from the to watch pile…
Hentai Kamen (2013)

The cover of the Australian DVD release


Film: Ahhhhh, manga and Anime: the formats where any perversion, no matter how tentacley is welcomed. I’ve read and watched a lot of stuff over the years, and two manga that certainly caused the weirdo in me to stand up and take notice are Go Nagai’s Kekko Kamen, about a nude heroine who rides a motorcycle, and the one this movie is based upon, Keishū Andy’s Kyūkyoku Hentai Kamen, about a young man who gets super powers whenever he smells the… aroma… of the panties he wears on his face as a disguise.

This adaptation was done by Yūichi Fukuda, both direction and writing, who seems to be mainly a TV writer and director, but is also responsible for the sequel to this film Hentai Kamen: The Abnormal Crisis, which came out three years after this first one.

Kyosuke (Ryôhei Suzuki), the son of a now-deceased police officer and a bondage mistress, is a confused young man. He has inherited his father’s sense of justice and tough guy attitude, but no matter how hard he tries in martial arts training, he just can’t match that with any sort of crime-fighting skill, until the day his new crush, Aiko (Fumiko Shimizu) gets held hostage by a bunch of crooks.

An example of the quality, Shakespearean dialogue.


On this day he manages to find his strength, sneaks into the building, knocks out a guard and takes his clothes, including his mask, but when he goes to put the mask on, he accidentally picks up a pair of unwashed girls panties, and once the… um… aroma… hits him, his perverted gene that he inherited from his mother kicks in and he becomes the superhero Hentai Kamen!!!

Hentai Kamen quickly finds his powers are needed to save his school from the grips of mad criminal who sends assassin after assassin to defeat him, but will brute force beat Hentai Kamen, or will a more cunning plot prevail?

The object of HK’s affection: Aiko.


The main actor, Ryôhei Suzuki, has to be given a huge amount of credit in this film though. He is dressed throughout the film in mainly what only can be described as a white mankini and a pair of panties across his face. Thankfully there isn’t a scrap of fat on his entire body, and I have to admit that maybe my wife stopped whilst I was watching the film and emitted a ‘phwoar’ before casting a disappointed glance in my direction.

Overacted, a touch overlong, with a ridiculous script and some pretty bad CGI all make for a pretty funny movie that entertains and surprises throughout. Not for the faint of heart though, and there are more dick jokes than you could shake a stick at.

One thing this film definitely IS, however, is the cure for all the Marvel and DC movies that are littering the cinemas.

Score: ***1/2

The Australian DVD menu screen


Format: Hentai Kamen: Forbidden Superhero runs for 101 minutes was reviewed on the Australian Madman DVD release which is presented in an excellent and clean 16:9 image with a perfect Dolby Digital 5.1 audio, presented in Japanese with English subtitles.

Score: ***

Extras: The only extras on this disc are trailer for this film, and for Ace Attorney, Real, Badges of Fury and A Werewolf Boy

Score: *1/2

WISIA: This film is 100% a one-watch only. It’s funny, but has no longevity.

Well, why don’t you..?